Stuck in my Head Today

It's nine o'clock on a Saturday
the regular crowd shuffles in
There's an old man sitting next to me
Makin' love to his tonic and gin
He say, Son can you play me a memory
I'm not really sure how it goes
But it's sad and it's sweet and I knew it complete
When I wore a younger man's clothes

Da da da de de da
da da de de da da da
Sing us a song, you're the piano man
sing us a song tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for a melody
And you've got us feelin' alright

Now John at the bar is a friend of mine
He gets me my drinks for free
And he's quick with a joke or to light up your smoke
But there's someplace that he'd rather be
He says Bill, I believe this is killing me
As the smile ran away from his face
Well I'm sure that I could be a movie star
If I could get out of this place

Sing us a song, you're the piano man
sing us a song tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for a melody
And you've got us feelin' alright

Now Paul is a real estate novelist
Who never had time for a wife
And he's talking with Davy who's still in the navy
And probably will be for life
And the waitress is practicing politics
As the businessmen slowly get stoned
Yes, they're sharing a drink they call loneliness
But it's better than drinking alone
It's a pretty good crowd for a Saturday,
And the manager gives me a smile
'Cause he knows that it's me they've been coming to see
To forget about life for awhile.
And the piano sounds like a carnival
And the microphone smells like a beer
And they sit at the bar and put bread in my jar
And say "Man, what are you doin' here?"

Da da da de de da
da da de de da da da
Sing us a song, you're the piano man
Sing us a song tonight.
Well, we're all in the mood for a melody
And you've got us feelin' alright.

Who's Your Daddy

Next Thursday I am scheduled to be a Dad for the second time. Isn't it weird that we can schedule things like that. I look at my calendar the doctor looks at their calendar. Yea Thursday's good for me, how 'bout you. Around noonish ok for you.

Spent the last week or so disenfecting for the new born. What, is my filth not good enough for her. It's not like she is going to run out my wife's crotch and see my dirty dishes a give me that I disapprove look.

Why is it that my wife wants to go to lemmas class to practice giving birth. Like she needs a reason to call me an asshole. Breath, breath, go to your safe place. Screw that; pump in the drugs.

Women have this weird right of passage thing about labor and pain. Mine took eight hours with no drugs. Well mine took twelve hours and came out sideways.

In my opinion its like going to get a tooth pulled and saying you don't want novicane. You want to feel the root's of the your tooth being ripped from your skull. That way you'll appreciate it. Bull. Embrace the science. Welcome to the USA.